Children’s shopaholism: why is it so relevant?
Almost all parents are faced with the fact that the grown-up child more and more often starts talking about new clothes. By asking for a completely unnecessary (in the parents’ opinion) thing, he confidently motivates the need for a purchase, describing in bright colors the situation that has developed in the class … Sergej Khakimullin, Shutterstock.com After all, the hike for knowledge is becoming more and more a demonstration of his style, and often belonging to a particular subculture. Any teenager is experiencing an incredible euphoria when buying the desired phone, stylish shoes and trendy jeans. But this enthusiasm is almost always associated with the anticipation of a violent reaction from classmates and friends, that is, he is looking forward to the “moment of glory.” More recently, the passionate desire for beautiful things was the prerogative of girls. Today, almost all the boys are not averse to getting hold of the latest model computer, multifunctional headphones and other new-fangled gadgets. So what happens in the souls and heads of adolescents? Images imposed by glossy magazines have a huge impact on modern children. In addition, youth series and musical idols also play an important role in shaping the perception of the world. If one cannot become as famous as a peer, then why not try to even remotely be like him in a dressing style, for example. Today, a child very early begins to strive to form his own personal little world on his own. Often, he does not just talk with his parents about the purchase of this or that thing, but firmly and unconditionally declares his decision to have it. Teenagers’ passion for the material world has increased more than ever, and many of them already suffer from shopaholism and go shopping for hours almost every day trying on things and mentally associating their way out to the public. The high cost is disappointing and depressing, and in dreams that time is spinning when you can afford almost everything. Sometimes a painful commitment to the latest fashion and youth trends is rooted in the usual loneliness, the roots of which the parents themselves laid in their deep childhood. Any mother is proud when her daughter is dressed like a princess: everyone likes to receive compliments and catch envious glances. When, at the age of five, a girl with bows and ruffles shyly starts talking about how she likes to wear sports shoes and jeans, because it’s more convenient to play ball, Mom doesn’t want to hear about it, continuing to cultivate dresses, shoes with heels and white knee socks. It turns out that the child did not have the right to even a small independent choice, which is very wrong, since he will sooner or later take his own. Young shopaholics perceive the world through the prism of things, evaluating any purely in appearance. Often they try to set the tone for peers. And such a manic craving for things arises from the fact that mom and dad compensated for lack of attention and caress with expensive toys and accessories that were not of the same age. And it was necessary to try to captivate the child with something and, if possible, to share this hobby with him as much as possible, constantly discussing the issues of concern to him and revealing to him the world not only from the material side. Some parents are afraid that the refusals and restrictions of the child’s needs may nurture an inferiority complex in him, that is, set the standard for a “gray” person, a quiet triad, who limply swims with the flow of life. With such attitudes, the child will never be able to see and understand the main family values: love, respect, understanding, mutual assistance, responsiveness and kindness – that is, things that cannot be acquired for money, but that forms the inner core of a full-fledged person. The secret of life is that the one who does not specifically pursue all sorts of material goods, but lives with his true interests and dreams, is not afraid to take risks, sometimes he is ready for change, much more than others, including financially. We must speak frankly with our child, reveal to him the wisdom of life. At the same time, his point of view should be taken, but finding the right arguments and deciding together what the family can afford to buy with what frequency. It is necessary to teach him to clearly distinguish between the main and the secondary, because a person who constantly gives priority to a secondary one slowly kills the personality in himself. It is foolish to spend the lion’s share of time in order to superficially correspond to the majority. The main thing in a person is his personality, which cannot be bought, but can only be created.